Into the Lion's Den.....GRRRRR

I am having a tough time with some people. I was raised to be honest and to tell the truth if asked. But this whole talking bad about your family behind their back and be all smiles and sugar to their face is beyond me. It really hurts. Can you truly call yourself a Christian if you do this. I am torn. I am in a difficult position right now, in that we live with one of the people. And even though we are very appreciative of their generosity at what cost are were here. My sanity for one! I know I am ranting, but this is my safe place. I have been praying, and believe me that is the only thing that is keeping me from going street rat crazy on these people. Ya know you get hurt once and don't say anything is one thing but many many many times is another. There is only so much that a person should have to endure! well, here I go into the lions den........Lord send your angels ahead like you did for Daniel.....Amen

---La La.

my work.

this is my painting. I am very proud of it. I need to paint more, but i just don't seem to haver the money to put into it. I am just going to have to save. It is hanging in my husband Ryan's guitar shop, so many people are able to see it.

--La La

Strong enough!

I am struggling with this work out regiment. I just need to get over this hump. and I don't mean my butt, even though that would be great. Well, I guess I just have hard work ahead of me. There are just sooo many bad habits that I need to get over. Have you ever had to quit something cold turkey? I have not. Soooo this is my major road block. I know I can do it, well, I hope I can. Why is this so hard? You would think that it wouldn't be so hard since I know how bad it can get just by looking at my family. My dad struggles with diabetes, my little sister is extremely obese and almost all women in my family is overweight.

Ok this is my reality check.

testing testing is this mic on.....

Attention Angela Lawley this is your body!! i have had enough. So, from this day forward you are going to live like you are worth it. You are going to be a rock from now on! You are going to get to work and lose this weight, because you know what I don't like the way I look!!!!!

That is all

---La La

keepin' it goin'

So today is mine and Ryan's 13th anniversary of our first date!

I remember it so clearly, how cute and sweet it was and how much I was in-love with him! You see, the first time I ever saw Ryan was when I was in the 11th grade. He was attending the junior college in my home town. I was in the drill team and it was the day of our homecoming parade. We were all lined up to start the parade. I looked over to a group of guys from the drum line, and there was Ryan talking to guys from my high school. I was completely in-crush with him. I didn't know his name or where he was from. Well, that day came and went. I really didn't' think anymore about him, cuz really he was much older than me and I didn't know who he was. Years went by and I tried out and made the drill team from the junior college Ryan had attended. There I met this girl named Charlotte Green. We hit it off immediately! I was dating this guy whom I thought was "the one", but Charlotte had someone else in mind. We were at a game in Navaro when Charlotte introduced me to her friend of many years....RYAN!!! I couldn't believe it. I didn't know what to think.....I was soooo excited. It took a few months before we actually dated, but it happened and we had our first date on February 6th 1997.. And the rest is history REALLY REALL REALLY GREAT HISTORY!!!!


All I can say is......I love you baby, and I am so happy. I can't wait for the next 13, and the next and the next and the next and so on!!

----La La

Today is a new day, well, that is what I keep telling myself. I think if I say it enough it will become a reality. I have decided to take controll of my life and lose weight! I started last week actually, but I think that this is really going to be it. I am 217lbs.......OMG I can't believe I just wrote it outloud! Well, the first step to recovery they say is admitting you have a problem. I am just so sick and tired of being stuck in this lump of a body. I was cleaning up my bookshelf today and I came across a picture of myself in junior high......I was a stick. You can see in all my pictures a gradual change in weight(for the better). Until I was about 20 then it went to the dogs! I will post pictures to show what I am talking about. But life happened and now I am here. I look in the mirror and I dont recognize myself. and to add insult to injury I found ANOTHER grey hair!!!!!!!!!!! I am about to turn 32 and I have completly lost myself. I am having a Sally moment! You know that scene in "When Harry met Sally" Harry comes over to Sally's house to console her and she is sobbing because she is, "Going to be 40", he says"when!" Then she says"SOMEDAY!" I am the age she was in the movie. And I am at that emotional precipice, But I am sooooo willing to just jump in and take a chance on myself!

So, this is the beginning of the end of being FAT! Wish me luck!!!

---La La

Here we go!

This is something that I thought that I would ever do....I mean who would want to listen to what I have to say. I am not talking about the regular people that I talk to every day. But people out here in the universe, people that I can't see or touch. Well, whomever you are I hope that my words will help you feel more connected with someone. I hope that I can help you feel like you are not alone. Even though the world seems so big and feels like no one cares. I will be here to talk to! I guess today is a good day to stat a blog!


--La La